It happens to all of us. For some, early. For some, just on time. I present to you… *drum roll please* … a guide to the dreadfully life-consuming Senioritis.
What is Senioritis?
Senioritis is a disease characterized by the lack of motivation and ambition in a student during his or her last year of high school. After being accepted into a college, a senior has no reason to try particularly hard in school because, well, what does it matter?
Whom does it affect?
Studies show that Senioritis affects 99% of high school students entering their senior year. Some juniors have been diagnosed with the disease, as have some sophomores.
What are the symptoms of Senioritis?
Well, I’m glad you asked! Here are some common symptoms with supplementary real-life photos, which were donated by real-life victims.
Stage #1: The student can’t wait to escape from high school. Any and all objects, concepts, or conversations relating to school begin to result in symptoms such as eye-rolling, sighing, quick outbursts, or even the occasional tear…
…and every week becomes a long week.
Stage #2: The student accepts that he/she must, in fact, endure the remaining months of torture. The student finds a coping mechanism. In my personal experience, I’ve found the creation and sharing of corny puns has been a common method.
Pro Tip: Never, ever, EVER, at any cost, try to exploit the student’s coping mechanism. It will only worsen the behavior and result in a delayed recovery.
Stage #3: After a while of groping for a handle on life during stage #2, the student begins to embrace life and uncover his/her true identity.
Stage #4: Your friends become so confused about your behavior that you begin to befriend your cat. Not out of desperation, but because you want to.
If the student doesn’t have a cat, then imaginary friends are always an option.
Step #5: After the student has accepted who he/she has become, the student will begin to recognize the Senioritis epidemic in his/her peers…
…and the student considers anyone who has his/her life together at this point as a supernatural being whom you are too far gone to attempt to follow in the path of.
Step #6: After the student realizes that there is no hope of regaining the lost ambition from earlier on in the year, the student begins to embrace what life has come to with open arms. This may include increased consumption of as much food as possible,
throwing away all aspirations to be photogenic and embracing how he/she is meant to look,
realizing that everybody makes mistakes (everybody has those days),
enjoying the spontaneity that parents bring to life rather than criticizing them and condemning them as “embarrassing,”
beginning to replace the word “angry” with “salty” or “sassy,”
wanting to look presentable not because the student wishes to impress his/her peers, but because the student wishes to feel self-confident…
(or perhaps because it wasn’t a choice),
seeing school more as a “laughing matter” than anything,
beginning to lose sight of the blurred line between “hate” and “love” because it’s all the same at this point,
and capturing the everyday norms of your friends simply because you can…
…but in the end, the student realizes that it’s important to support his/her friends through such a time of need for mutual understanding.
Stage #7: The student finds out that seniors from other high schools are graduating before he/she will, catapulting the student into a state of frenzy, confusion, and slight aversion.
Step #8: But when graduation day finally rolls around, the student will not stop smiling!
How can I prevent it?
The answer is simple: you can’t.
Okay, then how to I cure it?
The antidote to Senioritis is graduation. Once a diseased student graduates from high school, he or she will be consumed by the excitement of starting college.
I hope this informational session has helped you diagnose yourself or a loved one with this highly contagious disease. It’s important to spread awareness so students know that they’re not alone in this time of darkness, and that it does, in fact, get better.
Thank you for reading, and best of luck with your future senior endeavors.
Photography: All photographs represent real-life situations of seniors who suffered of Senioritis. We are here to tell you: it does get better! Never lose hope, and keep fighting till the very end. Good luck!